Come Recommended: Thinking about bringing mom and dad to your next interview? You may want to give that another thought!
Revealed in a recent survey by Adecco, eight percent of Generation Y job seeker seekers have had their parents accompany them to a job interview. What’s even more interesting is that three percent of those Gen Y job seekers have allowed their parents to actually attend the interview as well — talk about taking helicopter parenting to a whole new level!
18 comments:
First of all, of course it's ridiculous for parents to accompany a grown adult into an interview. This article is absolutely, 100% correct about that, and I can't imagine anyone disputing that. An interview is about showcasing why you are the best person for a job, and you parents have no part in that.
However, I do not at all agree with this article's assertion that Generation Y has to "pull up their boot straps and dive right into the workplace" all by themselves, because it's the only way to be independent and self-sufficient. Clearly, the person who wrote this article already has a job, or they wouldn't say something like that in this economic climate. If your parents can help you get your foot in the door and put you in contact with someone, or send you a job posting that you wouldn't have found otherwise, that's wonderful. Why does networking, which we are all encouraged to do and told that it's how we're all going to get jobs, have to exclude parents? I'm not at all saying that parents should write your resume for you or get their friend to hire you sight unseen, and of course we should all be independent adults who know how to do a job search and get an interview, but parents are people too; they have business experience, and contacts, and advice to give, and as long as it's not excessive, what's wrong with using them for their people-ness instead of forcing them out of the process just because they're your parents?
I feel so, incredibly condescended to right now. I agree with the article's main point, but, like Cat, I think they're hitting the wrong buttons.
First of all, if our generation truly is depending on our parents more, then whose fault is it? Were we all born thinking, hey, let's be dependent and lazy? No, we weren't. But some of us were raised by parents who created that kind of behavior by overprotecting their child and being too involved in their lives.
The article criticizes kids that bring their parents to job interviews. Well, yeah, that's pretty bad. The article also criticizes kids who get help from their parents on resumes, college essays and networking. And that is completely unfair. My parents both looked over and gave me advice on my college essays, but so did my classmates. My dad, whose job is to look at resumes, helped me out with mine, but so did my teachers. See what I'm getting at here? We get help with lots of things from all kinds of people around us, but for some reason, if the help comes from our parents, it becomes a huge issue. It's normal to let your parents help you if they're willing, and can spare the time. That's how life works. People help each other.
Now, I'm willing to believe that our generation might be more used to getting help from our parents than others. But next time someone tries to make that point, they might want to consider an article that is incredibly insulting and generalizing.
I actually had no idea that people would go so low as to bringing their parents with them on a job interview. I can agree with Cat and Camille to a point on the issue of using parents as networking devices. My issue with this is that I'm pretty sure my parents have no idea what I want to do after college. They don't know the theatre industry and they don't have any connections, so it's not like I'm going to ask for them to find me a job any time soon. I am also the only one who knows exactly what I want for my future. I think the scary part of this article is the fact that Generation Y needs to rely on parents because they don't know how to deal with the future. I think that is part of growing up. We must have failures in order to climb up the ladder. I also disagree with Camille's first point about overprotective parents. True, there are some parents who are overprotective. My parents are definitely overprotective. But in some cases, this behavior causes teenagers to rebel and become independent. The fact that parents are now attending job interviews with their children can be the cause of rebel children returning to their parents for self-interest. When they realize that they have to grow up soon, they return to that protective source. Meanwhile, the parents don't want to lose the child again, so they go with it. Of course, this is just a theory. As for me, I have no idea how I will get a job after college. I think I'm just going to go wherever the wind blows.
Come on! WE ARE NOT ALL LIKE THAT. Our generation is in the process right now inheriting a world with more problems than there were 50 years ago, some the older generation caused, others happened naturally. What this article should say Generation X, Wake up! Helicopter parents are more often helicopter PARENTS than not. My mother included, sitting in college interviews was like watching parents compete for who's son was smarter. It was so sad. Generation X is leaving us with a world for a problems, cannot let go of their children, and then blame us for it! Parents these days are so over protective. I was in a college Q&A at Harvey Mudd, and a parent in the room grilled the student rep about things that made me embarrassed for the kid! What can my kid do to overload every semester? What is cell reception like here; I want to make sure he can call me whenever he needs me. It was gross!
My point is this: one more accusation about generation Y being coddled...just wait until the younger siblings come around. Then see who needs their mommys. Let your kids eat dirt.
A video on the subject: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M4IjTUxZORE
Obviously it's completely inappropriate to bring your parents to a job interview- and it's probably not going to get you the job, either. However, this writer seems to have a very skewed view of our generation- she seems to have constructed her viewpoint entirely off of "kids these days" rants. Her writing is filled with cliches like "pull yourself up by your bootstraps." She's not exactly the greatest expert on this either- she's only a junior in college, and has had mostly internships. She doesn't seem to understand that often one of the best ways to "get your foot in the door" is through using your connections- and if your parents have a connection that would get you a good job that you're qualified for, then passing up on that opportunity is just stupid. I know here at CMU, most of us go to this school in large part because we know it will get us some of the best connections out there, and make getting a job far easier than it would be graduating from any other school. This doesn't make us lazy- this makes us lucky to be here, and we're going to use that luck as much as possible. There are few enough job opportunities as it is, and not using your resources is only going to make it harder. I'm guessing she got most of her internships through her college. Gosh, why isn't she being independent? Can't she get a job herself? These questions are ridiculous- just be glad you got a job, and don't judge others for how they got theirs. Dependence is bad, but there's a difference between dependence and a wise use of resources. She seems to think any kind of help is dependence, and I disagree.
Taking your parents to interviews?! Madness. To me that just exudes not being ready for the job. If you need your parents to come with you, then you are not ready to handle being on your own and the employer will definitely take this into account. It is worrisome that so many young people now are so dependent on their parents still. But I also see why -- it is so difficult for young people to go out in the world and succeed on their own. Not only is the cost of living pretty extensive, but also trying to pay back loans and get a job in a new place on top of that is almost impossible. Young people end up being forced to go back home in order to get through it all. I have known people who have gone out on their own after college. Moved to a completely new city in search for a new life. It has taken them months to find a place to stay, and that's just temporary. The interviews they have been to (and mind you, this is just for any kind of job -- grocery store, cafe, teaching) have all had 50 people or more applying to the same position. This is a person not being picky, just looking for something to hold them over while they start to make their new life. Absolutely ridiculous. No wonder young people are so dependent on their parents.
Yes it is ridiculous that people would actually allow their parents to be apart of the interview process. That in no way shows any level of independence in an interview however many of the other statistics seem very relevant. We are the only generation where we are expected to make less than our parents before us, our levels of education have started to become more common and more common where is a college level education was sign of a higher education, now it is a sign of continued education. When I say this I mean that we allowed our education to continue past that of a high school education, however the education is so common it cannot be considered higher than most of the population. So when I see that parents are helping students find job opening it is not surprising to me that recent college graduates are using their parents as a resource to find job. I am actually much more disgusted with the way the article treats the issue condemning our generation for asking for help. The article treat this issue as if we are not independent and as if we could be embarrassed by doing so. It fails to recognize that yes people will be embarrassed if people know their parents helped them get the job, but it is a price we pay to use our parents as a resource until we are able full work by ourselves, which does not happen over night. It takes time build connections and pay back college debt and using parents as a middle ground to be fully functional is not a crazy thing it is what parents do they help you.
I think helicopter parenting has reached an all-time low. First off, I want to say that I am fully on board with asking your parents and similar people for help. However, bringing your parents to a job interview goes too far. In this day and age, jobs are difficult to come by, and even though we are getting out of the recession, it's still a difficult task. That does not mean that it's okay to bring your parents to an interview. Just think about it on simple level: the interviewer is interviewing you and trying to figure out whether you'd be a god fit with the company. Bringing your parents into that equation messes with the initial chemistry of the first encounter.
Yet, this article is written in such a condescending way that I can't help but feel embarrassed and disgusted with my peers. Instead of figuring ways to promote good job-hunting skills, the article quotes a Seth Rogen movie. Really? Thank you, Olivia, for identifying the problem, but how can we fix it?
I agree with the idea of this article, but it didn't seem to be very well-written and I think that weakened some of the authors arguments. Obviously it is inappropriate to bring a parent with you to an interview. The fact that only eight percent of generation Y job seekers do this is a pretty solid indication that it isn't the right way to go about the interview process. Unfortunately, the rest of the article basically repeats the claim that its inappropriate again and again. I also disagree with her points about parents involvement prior to the interview step. As an adult, yes you should be responsible for seeking out opportunities on your own. If you are suitable for a job, you should be capable of finding it yourself. However, if the opportunity were to arise where a parent could connect you with someone of help, why not take it? There's not much purpose in debating over what is an unfair advantage, everyone entering the workforce has advantages and disadvantages. Some help from parents may be okay, but either way whether or not you get a job is going to come down to you
I agree that it is absolutely ridiculous for a grown person to have their parents accompany them on an interview or write their resume for that matter. However, I don't think they really got to the root of the problem. It s not just about parents becoming too involved in the job search process, it starts much earlier that that. There are college students who still need their parents to check that they are up on time, eating right and doing their work. It makes no sense that this type of codependency is a trademark of our generation. At this point in life, your parents should be confident that they raise a person with enough common sense and intelligence, that you can be out in the world on your own. Anything less is unacceptable.
First of all, I don't think Gen Y is any different than any other generation in regards to using their parents' networks to get jobs... In fact, I'd wager that Gen X and Gen Y are abnormal in how few of us aren't doing similar things to what our parents are doing. There's a reason that a lot of the stereotypical "American Dream" includes a "blankity blank & sons" sign in front of some business.
It's also really frustrating to hear people, particularly those my parents' age, talk about how dependent Millennials are on their parents. When my dad was in college, he was able to make enough money in the summer to cover tuition, room and board at his private liberal arts school in New England. My mom was able to buy a business her senior year. I'm going to graduate with some significant debt, a choice I made with my eyes wide open, but one which will unquestionably impact some choices I'll be able to make in the next 10 years.
I have been operating completely independently for a couple of years now, and the most difficult part hasn't been the lack of support or anything like that, but all of the legislation that makes it unrealistically difficult for an 18 year old, a legal adult, to operate independently from her family. It's virtually impossible to file as an independent on your FAFSA without meeting certain very specific conditions. Without that, you can only take out loans and are ineligible for (federal) grants.
What I'm trying to say is it's not that easy to just cut the apron strings and go on your way. It's taken me a long time to figure out the most advantageous way to do so and I'm finally, after two and half years, getting there. It behooves the previous generations to keep us in "minor status" for as long as possible and until we can change some of these institutionalized problems, it's unrealistic to expect us to simply suck it up.
The idea of having your parents come to a job interview with you is completely ridiculous. I agree with the article that it makes you look dependent, immature, and is just generally embarrassing. I cannot believe that people actually do this. If I was an employer I would not hire anyone who did this. That all being said though, I think parents can help. In this job market I think you need to be able to use any and all connections and resources at your disposal to get a job and if you have a connection to a great job through one of your parents, I dont think that you should just disregard it because it would mean interacting with your parents in the job process.
Helicopter Parenting? I must say that I learn a new stupid expression everyday.
Yes, taking your parents to an interview is inappropriate!! However I don't think that this is what the author is trying to dig into in her article. The basis of this rant of an article is to show her disgust towards students or graduates whose parents help them get jobs through their connections. When did this become such a bad thing? Yes, we are all jealous of people who have parents who have key connections, making job searches easy for their kids, but that is their luck. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I have gotten jobs through my parents, cousins, family friends, friends. That is how the world works. Same for us in theatre; we get jobs through networking. I think that this had less to do with a common sense fact of don't take your parents to an interview and more to do with, why can't we just get jobs based on qualifications, ability and experience.
I didn't know this was a thing! People take their parents to job interviews? Wow! I honestly don't know why people would do that. Or have their parents write their resume! That is always a big NO NO!
That being said, I agree with everybody when they say that there is nothing wrong with using your parents as connections to get your foot in the door or to help you research jobs. It is the same as using other friends or family members to get an interview.
Additionally, when our parents get us an interview or internship opportunity, we still need to show off our skills, explain why we are good the job, etc...
Also, it really is dependant on our parents to have made us rely on them if we need them all the time, so we can't be blamed for how we were raised. But, I don't think the majority of our generation is as dependant as the article says.
I can't even understand the thought that bringing your parents to an interview is a good idea. There is no universe that this is a good idea. While it's good for people to make use of any and all possible connections in their lives in searching for jobs the idea of bringing your parents to an interview is ridiculous. What employer would actually let someone's parents into the room while they are interviewing someone. That would just be awkward for all parties involved.
Bringing you parents to the workplace? Maybe not the best chance at getting employment.... Clearly when applying for a job you want it to be clear that you are the best applicant for a position. You certainly don't want to present yourself with any "handicaps" for lack of a better word IE lack of experience, sloppy, disorganized etc. Bringing a parent to an interview is not portraying an sense of confidence you have in your ability to run your own life, so how can they have faith that you care capable to fulfill this position?
But also... this statement that Generation Y need to "pull up their boot straps and dive right into the workplace" is just plain ignorant. Has this person attempted to apply for a job recently? Does he know we are in an economic recession? Does he have student debt? Because honestly it's a dog eat dog world out there. And we shouldn't be penalized from utilizing our resources to secure employment.
I totally agree with this article.
I am actually quite shocked that college graduates will bring there parents to a job interview.
I don't think there's anything bad with depending on your parents. I think it's a great thing and you can always learn from your parents.
However, when it comes to going to a job interview, bringing your parent along really doesn't help. I think that subconsciously it makes you feel not confident and childish, not things that you want to feel before going into a job interview.
Again, I don't think there's anything wrong with having your parents help you out at the beginning of your adult life, but this is just taking it way too far.
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