SoundGirls.org: When I was 16, I was hired for my first front-of-house position. In my new role as “person in charge” I quickly began noticing all of the little obstacles that seemed to appear each night. They had been present before, of course, but never so obvious. The way that bands assumed anyone in the room except me was the sound engineer. The flashes of surprise that crossed their faces upon being pointed my way.
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Writing thank you notes used to be such a common thing, before text became a thing and changed the way we interact with people, including people we work with. When I was applying for colleges, I wrote thank you notes to my teachers who wrote recommendation letters for me. I also baked them brownies. It's just something nice to do to let others know that you appreciate and acknowledge the amount of work they did for you. It is interesting that in this article, the writer, Sydney Bolton, was only 16 at the time of her first job in which she experienced sexism in live sound. Her age definitely put her at a disadvantage in the eyes of her employers and co-workers, but I am glad that there are bands out there that could care less who their sound engineer is. Sydney was the expert in her area and should have been treated as such. She wouldn't have gotten the job if she didn't know what she was doing. I thought it was really great that she sent thank you notes to the band that treated her right. I hope that her letter opened up doors for her in the future.
Saying thank you and taking the time to write out a quick note is a small gesture that can have a big impact. Most people don't do it, so when somebody does, you notice. I'm glad that our program at CMU stresses this in our professional prep courses, because I think it's really important. Is it going to get you a job that you're not qualified for? No, but it might be the difference that tips the scales if you're pretty equally qualified with another candidate, and it can put you at the top of someone's list to call for their next job if you made a good impression with with your thoughtfulness on their last one. I know that I certainly notice when other's write me thank you notes, or otherwise express their appreciation after we've worked together. It leaves a rosy tint the next time your name comes up, and it might just make someones day.
This is a really interesting post for two reasons. A, it acknowledges that theatre - especially the more "technical" concentrations, such as lighting, sound, carpentry, etc - is an extremely male-dominated field and that women who work within it routinely face the same sort of challenges (which is so insanely frustrating.) But also, this article acknowledges the importance of (excuse my french), not being an asshole to work with. In high school, when I first started to take my theatre education more seriously and wanted it to become my career, someone told me that theatre is an extremely small network of people who talk to one another, and if you are a difficult person to work with the chances are word will spread and you will not have a lot of work. This was kinda an "off the record comment", but it stuck with me. It is so much more valuable to work with people who treat you with respect, than someone who is rude and simply just gets the job done.
In our current times, kindness and appreciation need to be on the front of everyone’s mind. This article is not only good for our struggling corona times, but women in the technical theatre industry are always in need of this kindness. Women in this industry have been making their mark for decades, and it seems like only recently have things started to turn around and be more inclusive. There are always subtle hints of sexism in the everyday world, but in the theatre world, but when a woman is in charge, people seem to make everything so much harder than it needs to be. I really like how the author of this article makes sure to note who does well with making her job easier by being a nice human being. I think just simply being a kind human being can take everyone further. After Corona, if any starts to act up we collectively just need to cancel them because we all had months of thinking where people could have spent this time becoming better people.
At first reading the title of this article, I thought it would be more of a story about how someone was doing nice things for someone and they never said thank you or something like that. But this article wasn’t that and I liked this article. I think this article brings some good points and at first glance, one might think “why do you have to thank someone for being a decent person, that should come naturally” but all too often in this business that doesn’t come naturally. It seems so easy to just respect people but in reality, everyone has biases and someone who is not a man in a male-dominated industry encounters that a lot. So I think telling people “thanks for being so great to work with” can go a long way because they will probably realize that not everyone is like that and they will appreciate you more for appreciating them. Saying thank you is such an easy thing to do and it really can only be a good thing. People don’t generally get mad at you or think less of you for saying thank you so there should be no reason not to.
This is a really refreshing article amidst this chaos! The author tells a great story about being treated well and how it was out of the ordinary for her that led her to thanking all the bands that were especially easy to work with. I’m sure her actions go a long way and the artists really appreciate her notes because she took the time to write it out. We’ve all had experiences working with needy and annoying performers, as well as the really nice and easy-going ones. Saying that you in person is also really important and crew this year is the first time that I’ve noticed a disparity between people who do. All of my previous experience has been small enough that I haven't been able to make a general statement about that but carnegie mellon has three distinct groups. The first group noticeably reminds themselves to thank people and compliment them on their work and you can tell that they always make a point of it. The second group is appreciative and sometimes verbalize it, but are easy going and fun to work with. These two camps are the largest percentage of the population, but the third and smallest are not as easy going and don't usually thank people for the help, except maybe at the end of the call, but I’ve only ever had one experience like that.
This note was short and sweet, yet totally effective. Positive experiences should not go unrecognized. Handwritten thank you notes were common and easy at my high school productions where tables were set up in the lobby to send "Kisses" (a note and a Hershey kiss). Having cards hand delivered to you before a performance was so touching. There's something about seeing someone's handwriting that makes it so much more personal. When I read a note it usually prompts me to think about them physically writing it. I don't know why. I just always picture that added effort and get happier. Especially at our school when we jump from production to production, sometimes we forget to take the time to thank our teams. Allowing ourselves to reflect on a process can provide healthy closure and consider how to move forward in the next one. Maybe then we can continue to grow.
I remember having a moment similar to this my junior year in highschool. I was stage managing a show called Antonio Lorenzzo Vannozo's Pinocchio and it was the first time I was working closely with a small cast for an extended period of time. This show, being a competition piece went on for about 5 months and before that show everyone questioned my actions like I was unqualified. And while I may have been new, I was more than capable of doing everything expected of me and being doubted constantly wasn't the most comfortable environment to work in. At the end of this competition run I got a brown paper bag of affirmations from all the actors on my show and it was such a touching experience I'll always remember. Having those physical artifacts that told me how much they appreciated what I did and how much they had grown to trust me over time was something that really drove me into theatre as an industry. There have been so many times in my life that I've been intensely grateful for the things people around me have done but before that I didn't understand the value of writing it down or telling them. It can really change a lot for someone just to feel like their hard work and competence is noticed.
I love thank you cards. As important as it is to say thank you to someone’s face, writing it down on a note can be much more meaningful. Today, most of us do not write or receive much mail, so when we do it feels really exciting and special. The act of writing down how grateful you are to someone increases its meaning exponentially. In the context of this article, this act of telling someone how much their actions meant to you is so much more important. In a field still so riddled with gender equality issues, sometimes those who just treat you kindly are the ones who have the most profound effect. But it is always a good idea to let them know. I still have a lot of thank you notes that friends have given me. I held onto them because some of them were unexpected, or just said something very very meaningful.
Back in high school when I assistant stage managed, I would often receive thank you cards from the stage manager or a senior actor in the show, sometimes even if I was only on deck crew. They made me feel seen and appreciated, especially since as a non-senior or run crew member, my job was small or I was overlooked by most actors. Once I rose to a higher job position, I made it a point to be as courteous and easy to work with as possible, to say thank you whenever possible. Not that I wasn't trying to be an easy person to work with in day to day life, but I realized the importance of it being a woman of color in theatre. During my run crew mini, my assistant stage manager wrote me a thank you note after the show. It was very sweet and much appreciated.
We work in an industry that so often mixes the personal with the professional. No matter what department you work in, you are creating something inherently emotional. Storytelling is inherently emotional. The industry is both emotionally and physically taxing and a simple "thank you" goes a long way and we just don't hear it often enough. When I finish working on something, I love to write a thank you note! We don't really write anything anymore, which I think is fine; we have more efficient ways of communication. I think a handwritten note is really heartwarming, but it could be a simple text. To me, the content is what's important. Hearing kind words honestly changes everything. It can brighten your day, week, month, and if we all do it enough, life. Overall, as an industry, appreciating people is something we need to do better, and I think more people are realizing and understanding this! So, I feel really optimistic about the treatment of theatre professionals in the future.
My mother always used to tell me that “your words are magic”. You never know how much what you say will affect the person you’re saying them to. For some people a thank you might be something they hear everyday, and it means nothing. But to others, that thank you might mean the world to them and it's something they never get to hear because they don’t get appreciated enough. Another thing with always remembering to say thank you is always remembering to be kind and give people the benefit of the doubt. You can never assume how someone’s day is going or how difficult someone’s life can be, so a simple two words or smile could mean a lot more to someone even than we think. Simply being respectful and kind to the people is all it takes to avoid conflict with a stranger and ensure that youaren;t the reason someone’s day is ruined.
I think this post is great. It is so cute that someone published this note, and amazing that they opened up about their experience. I think it is important to recognize the fact that some of the more technical roles in theatre are often filled by men. I have experienced a lot of sexism in doing theatre, and it can be very isolating and make doing what you love feel uncomfortable and wrong. Thank you notes have such a huge impact, and are such a positive thing. I think that this post is important and interesting because she uses this positive platform to talk about something that is so important. Thank you notes are a lasting token of appreciation, and they can have a huge impact. While this post was short, I think the words used were incredibly effective, and I really enjoyed this post. It was so lighthearted among all the coronavirus scares.
This!!! I am the firmest believer in telling them about the ways they make you feel, especially good, and if necessary, bad. Whether it’s something as minuscule as someone acknowledging my idea in a meeting, or something larger like the scrapbook my friend made me for my graduation, I’ll send that person a note telling them exactly how they made me feel. I know how good it feels to know that someone else feels that I value them, so I figured I would do the same for others. Writing thank you notes is a habit that my mom instilled in me at a very young age, and I am so glad that she did. It is such a rewarding process to pick stationary that matches your relationship with the person, and then proceed to write to them all of your emotions of gratitude. This calls upon all of those good feelings, which are always nice to relive. It also provides closure for the experience you are thanking them for, and offering a bridge for more experiences in the future.
This article was a short and sweet little break from the endless waves of news about the pandemic. It’s good to be grateful for all of the little things people do for you, even if it’s just being a kind human being. I know that I try to thank people as often as I can for the things that they do for me because I want them to know that I appreciate the effort, just as it’s nice being thanked by someone else for doing something. I remember back in freshman year for the Cabaret crew, I thanked the actors so many times for always being so kind and understanding to the crew, especially since I’d had the experience working with some pretty awful actors. Everything is so turbulent and everyone is anxious right now, I think more people need to try to give more thanks around for all of the good that’s still left in the world.
This is such an important habit. Sometimes I feel like our society has really fallen down on being polite in the everyday day to day life as well as in the professional world. When I appreciate something that someone has done for me no matter how small a thing it is, I always make sure to thank the person. It is really important to make people feel appreciated. After everyone of my college essays, I thanked my interviewers for their time with a quick email afterwards. And idk how much that affected anything, but I would like to think that it helped my chances of getting accepted to the schools I got in to because it was a good show of character. It is a small thing to say thank you and it only takes a minute but it is definitely an important practice that everyone needs to work on.
I was one of those kids who always hated writing thank you notes for birthday or christmas presents, and even for high school graduation presents I was dragging my feet and annoyed about the whole process. It just felt so forced and ungenuine, only happening because there were older people who expected them on the other end even though I’d already thanked them in person. But I love this article, and I think the distinction here is that the notes the author describes in her article are actually genuine thank you’s that she may not be able to express in another way, would hopefully be a pleasant surprise to the recipients, and encourages them to maintain their good attitudes in future shows. They have a good reason and a good result. I think the same can be said about thank you’s after job interviews - sometimes. A lot of times it’s more of a ‘okay they’re expecting this because it’s just a thing you’re supposed to do so let me fill in this form letter’, and in those cases I think it kind of misses the point. A thank you letter should be genuine, remark on something that was actually good or helpful in the interview, with ‘reminding them that you exist and are completing this step of the process’ as a side effect, not the main point.
I think this article highlights two really, really important ideas: (1) to treat everyone around you with respect and understanding to impact them positively, and (2) to thank those that do for their positive impact. To point number 1, you should be able to respect that the person you are working with is good at their job and that they were hired for that job for a reason. There is no reason to undermine anyone’s work, no matter who they are or what they look like. Everyone deserves respect. To point number 2, I am a big advocate for thank you notes to people, which may come from being forced to write them at a young age from my very southern family. But whether it be to a friend for helping me out in life, or to a director for being incredible to work with on a show, taking 5 minutes to let them know they matter and impacted you can be so meaningful. I think that thank you notes are a small way that you can remind others that they matter, and that their kindness/ compassion/ understanding does positively benefit you in some way.
I had not really considered the impact of saying thank you in a context like this, but it is true that it can help encourage people to be better. Sometimes doing the most to respect someone who is usually dismissed can be nerve wracking and come with a lot of stigma when it is not at all common practice. Showing how much that meant to you with a note or a word of thanks can encourage people to continue doing so despite the potential stigma. I do not necessarily think that applies here as being made fun of for refusing to mansplain or otherwise dismiss a woman is not so common anymore, but there are plenty of situations in which it could be a risk to be openly progressive. Being openly appreciative of those people can aid in making that a more widespread school of thought than the opposing view.
On the one hand, I am glad that this sound engineer found a way to connect with and thank the people and bands who made her job easier and treated her with respect. Being a woman in this industry is very difficult because, as Sydney Bolton said, people constantly assume that everyone in the room except for you is the person in charge. When people for once do not automatically assume that the first guy they see is the one running things, it is refreshing. And I could see how someone would want to thank them for that. On the other hand, this is not something women should have to do. Not only do women not owe someone a thank you for giving them basic respect, but in some ways I feel like providing that thank you is something that should not have to happen. Respect should be given regardless in a professional situation. This is not to say that I do not value “thank you’s,” because I do believe that is is right and necessary to give credit and appreciation where it is due, but I do not believe people who are not blatantly sexist deserve a reward for not being blatantly sexist.
I am currently putting an online musical project together with my friends in the theatre company. We set three basic rules in advance of this project. 1. One must complete their tasks without communicating each other face to face. 2. One must not go outside on the grounds of this project. 3. One must understand that the communication is the key, and avoid using insensitive words even when criticizing. Among the obvious rules at this time, I find the last rule very important. What I found interesting is when everyone is working on their tasks at home, we don’t have simple tasks like physically handing papers to one another or letting others go through the narrow hallway. Therefore, the number of “Thank You” is limited in the beginning and the end of the email, which Gmail automatically suggests. I think this is where checking-in becomes very important and leaving a digital “Note on Saying Thank You” that does not necessarily relate with a job task.
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