TheGrindstone: You’re smart women. You’re professional women. You’re confident women. You’re mature women. So why are so many of you speaking like ditzy, novice, insecure, childish girls? Break these six speaking habits now to make sure your voice conveys the amazing, business-savvy femme that you really are.
6 comments:
Wow, I don't think I've ever read a more condescending article. Yes, what the author is saying has a point, but it's brought across in such a way that it's demeaning and insulting. It's absolutely disgusting. Also, instead of providing ways that someone could change their speaking, they point out various speaking faux pa and insult them. While saying "like" a thousand times is annoying, telling someone that their worth is based on that one factor is just insensitive.
I agree with the article that these are habits that people should get rid of. Presentation is always super important, in any situation, and if your powerpoint looks great but the way you speak makes you sound unprofessional, then you've got the problem.
Now onto the real problem. Why is this article directed at women? Men do these things too! Well, turns out it's because this is a website for women about work things. Okay. Fine, that makes a little more sense. But this article could've been very empowering, and instead it was just condescending, as Katie pointed out. So yeah, I will try to implement these things into the way I speak, but because I'm a person, not because I'm a woman.
The problem I have with every single article I've read from this is how self-sabotaging they are. Using examples like valley girls and Judge Judy serve only to pull out the bottom of trying to make women equal in the workplace. The website's feature video is some Cosmo editor saying to "Be like the woman you hate at work." Because confident women who don't pull punches and ask for what they want are unlikable. I find the entire premise of this website (making big bad business things more accessible to hormone-factories)super distasteful and offensive.
I have mixed feelings about this article. I think that its true that these are bad habits that many of us have while speaking but I think it would be valuable to think about why we speak this way. Aside from picking up the habits from the people around us, there's also a matter of confidence in the ideas that you're presenting while speaking. If I'm insecure about something, it may be easier to speak more casually, falling into some of these bad habits. If you don't sound too passionate about what it is that you're saying, it won't be as crushing if you're incorrect or if someone disagrees with you. But speaking this way isn't actually going to help you. We should try to be better at speaking with conviction, not just because it makes you sound smarter or more mature, but also because it makes you sound more certain of your ideas.
I agree with Camille on this 100%. This article should not have been addressed to just women, keeping in mind that it was posted on a website for women, because men have very similar speech problems at all. This is not a gender thing nor should it ever be thought of in that way. AND I definitely think the message could have been delivered in a much less condescending as belittling way. Now on to the meat of the article. Despite how it was written, it is very true. These issues in speech affect how we see others and how we think of them. A brilliant individual that constantly pauses with, 'umm' or 'uhh,' or uses 'like' as a filler word will come across as less than they are. It's a shame, really, but something that needs to be made aware of.
As a big talker myself, I am guilty to doing all of these. What I have come to realize is that depending on who I am with and what I am talking about different habits are more apparent that others. Personally, I don't feel like I will ever break these habits. This is because it is really hard to change the way you talk. Have you ever tried to? Because I have and it is hard. I think that if we are aware of these habits we are more likely to prevent them.
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