Fast Company: As an introvert, I dread large conferences. I get invited to a number throughout the year, and I usually scramble to find excuses for why I can’t attend. Since I have spent much of my career posing as an extrovert, some people are surprised to discover that I really don’t enjoy networking at large gatherings. I worry about feeling overwhelmed by the crowds, not remembering people’s names, having to sit alone for meals, drawing a blank and not being able to engage in small talk, and, of course, worried I won’t know anyone there. Just thinking through all of this is absolutely exhausting.
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In an industry of people who are known for being bubbly and outgoing, networking can feel extremely daunting if you’re on the introverted side. Still, it’s important that you establish yourself as a warm, easily approachable person—no matter how good your work is, the first impression people have of you will always be how you present yourself. Mita Mallick, the author of the article, gives some great advice on how to make the most of networking opportunities even if you are an introvert: find super connectors. Super connectors, or anyone who is already well-established and can help introduce you to the people you’re interested in meeting, remove a lot of the stress that comes with navigating a large group of professionals. Additionally, entering any conversation with someone you’re already acquainted with is a great way to ease tension. Whenever I have to network in a group of large people and I’m feeling anxious, I try to pretend I have an extroverted alter ego who can do all the conversational heavy lifting for me. It sounds silly, but finding ways to overcome these challenges is important to succeed and make connections.
This article was interesting to me, specifically because this is something I struggle with too. While I have improved recently, I am not at all good at networking. This article made some good points about networking at large conferences, however I wish it had talked more about how to network in the day to day sense. How do you just start talking to someone? How does one go about connecting after you’ve found your way to people? Those small interactions, specifically starting them, are a big struggle for me. I found the author’s point about super connectors fun, because I know exactly the kind of people they’re talking about. I know several people who are able to just talk to everyone and make friends everywhere. That’s a skill that as of right now, I don’t know. Overall, this article was a good start but I will continue my search for networking answers!
I am not the most extroverted person, I get intimidated in places where I know no one and have a hard time finding my voice to speak when uncomfortable. This article makes me feel a little more seen in an industry that relies heavily on connections being able to start conversion with anyone. Knowing that there are people who are introverted just like me and have made successful careers in the entertainment industry is a comfort that is more welcome than I previously thought. The tips given in this article such as planning, researching, and taking time for yourself are super valuable and I will 100% be using them in the future for conferences and events that I will go to for theatre/enterainment. I remeber conventions like Thescon in high school and have had many scenarios where reminding myself of the advice in this article would have been super helpful. I can get overwhelmed very easily, so I hope that I can practice more of this kind of grace with myself and build lasting connections.
Even as a more extroverted person, massive conventions and networking events can still be really exhausting. I think the suggestions of this article are really beneficial for any individual that doesn’t love large convention events. Planning who exactly you want to talk to in advance sounds really nice to be honest. That way the stress of figuring out your plan for the day can feel less overwhelming when all the options aren’t sitting right in front of you smiling, they can be on a computer screen instead. Similarly I think setting a goal of meeting new people sounds really good too! My biggest issue when it comes to a daunting task is really just starting it, so by putting a specific goal post to aim for it makes getting started feel a little easier when I feel like I can make quantifiable progress in a meaningful way. Even lastly, making time to decompress is so important, conventions like that aren’t things you can just keep pushing through that easily, you really need to take it day by day.
In my head I’ve always seen normal socialization and networking as two completely different things although they take some of the same skills. Networking in my head is a lot more strategic, you need to think about what you say more and the goal is completely different than a normal conversation. That’s why networking is so much more stressful to me than regular conversations and why I struggle so much with it( that and the fact I’ve only gotten to network a few times in my life, I have recently been getting better at talking to people about work opportunities). I do agree with him though that it’s important to stay level headed, if you head into the conversation disorientated than you’ve already ruined that conversation since what results might be a bad impression of your character. It’s safer to not converse if your not in the mood, Not every opportunity needs to come into fruition if you’re not prepared for a business conversation trying to network would do more harm than good.
I clicked on this article because I am always interested to see and read strategies on networking. Most of my friends view me as a natural network maker, and often tell me how impressed they are at how fast I can “make a connection” but honestly I am completely terrified of having to talk to strangers. Whenever I have a conference or an interview I am a wreck because I never know what to say and I am afraid of making the wrong first impression and losing out on a potential connection/mentor/friend etc. Despite what people may think I am actually very inwardly shy, I pretend to be an extrovert and to be bubbly but it is exhausting. I thought that the article had some very good advice on how to approach conferences and other large social gatherings as an introvert which I appreciated but I would be interested to learn their strategy on how to open a conversation with someone new.
I don’t consider myself an introvert, but I often find myself befriending them. Whenever I am talking to someone who works in one of the industries my friends are interested in I always tell them about that friend and introduce them to each other when possible. I wouldn’t consider myself a supperconnector yet, but I do feel like I have a knack for finding and talking to the right people and I try to bring my friends along and prop them up in the networking world. Even I feel the need to decompress and sort my thoughts after a ling day of networking, but I have seen how much it drains people who are introverts. If no decompression time is worked in it can cause issues. Maybe just a quiet lunch, a couple hours of relaxation or exercise, or a good nap can help to rejuvenate someone after talking to a lot of people.
I have been to a grand total of one conference in my life, and as an introvert, I can safely say that it was one of the most draining experiences of my life. There's something about thousands of people in a room talking all at once that just makes me tired thinking about it. So I very much appreciate this person's tips on how to survive, and maybe even get something out of conferences despite this. I especially liked the tip about taking time to decompress, because there is a point of diminishing returns, where no matter how much you try to force yourself to do something, if you don't take the time you need to take care of yourself, even if your physically at the events, it's much harder to be emotionally present. I also liked the tip of figuring out what you're going to do each day beforehand, so you don't lose any energy to decision paralysis.
I have been to a couple conferences, and it's a lot. They are loud, filled with walking from table to table, meeting tons of people and reintroducing yourself over and over. I've gotten better at doing that, but it still doesn't come as naturally to me as it does to a lot of people, and it's definitely draining. I really liked the tip about having a super connector. There have been many times in my life where I have just relied on my super social friends and allowed the to take charge in social situations, and it still benefits me. I think going around with a friend who is much better at connecting and navigating those environments can make that whole experience much more positive.
I also agree with allowing yourself to take breaks, and not go to every single session. These conferences are often packed with easily 14 hours of back to back things going on, and it feels like you need to be at everything. But it's important to remember that missing one event is okay, especially if you are able to take a break and recharge, and come back energized to keep going through the day. That will definitely help with exhaustion and allow you to get more out of the event.
I am definitely an introvert, and so the idea of having to go to conferences and conventions one day scares me quite a bit. Going to an event where the whole idea is to socialize when you are bad at socializing is terrifying. However I really like how this article broke it down and gave tips on how to survive these events without being too far outside of your comfort zone. One idea that I particularly liked was befriending someone who is a "super connector". One of the best ways I have found to socialize as an introvert is to be friends with an extrovert and jump off of their connections to create my own. I hate starting conversations with people, but can oftentimes be very good at carrying them on if somebody else starts them. This article has definitely helped give me the tools I need to have an easier time tackling this situation in the future
All of this advice I find quite sound and I have used it before, particularly in planning out an agenda ahead of time. I find it useful to make sure I can do everything I want to and so I don’t miss any overlapping events because I wasn’t careful. Using an agenda to plan out breaks such as for lunch, coffee, or just wandering around I find quite useful. Having sporadic breaks doesn’t make me as relaxed since I don’t know when that sporadic break will be sporadically over, so a set amount of time to not focus on meeting or talking with people gives me time to reconfigure. Having friends at a conference is definitely a boost when trying to talk to strangers. Trying to network at a conference where I don't actually know anyone there is something I’m still trying to figure out how to do. Though one thing I keep in mind is that most people at a conference are there to talk to people, finding new friends and people to keep you company is easy when they are also looking for it.
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