Tuesday, December 04, 2018
How to Network When In-Person Contact Stresses You Out
lifehacker.com: Talking to strangers in a crowded room where everyone wants something from each other is a true nightmare, and at times it’s the most direct path to career development. But there is another way to network—from behind a computer screen.
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11 comments:
This article was a lot more informational than I thought it was going to be and it took a different approach than the title lead the reader to believe. I really enjoyed what this article had to say about how networking is a long term process and that we are lucky that now-a-days most of that long term networking can be done through a text or a simple email. One of my favorite pieces of advice in this article was the fact that everyone needs help. I think many young professionals are scared to reach out to others for help because they feel as though they shouldn't need help, but networking and getting jobs from that networking is simply offering and asking for help. It can be uncomfortable at first but even the young people can teach the veterans a thing or two. Overall, I think this article points out some really simple ways in which someone can become a master at networking.
Not to be a negative Nero, but I find this article extremely unhelpful. The three big points fall a bit flat. It seems obvious that you should network when things are doing well--you want people to think of you at your best, not at your worst when you are grubbing for work or assistance. And yes, obviously you can keep in touch with people over the internet. And yes, obviously you should not spam your contacts. But maybe that is just me; maybe I need a remedial course in how to talk to people you do not know well. I guess I also reject the notion of maintaining professional contacts you do not like as people; I do not think I have ever been so desperate as to ask someone I find unpleasant for work. My last complaint is that this article only addresses how to maintain a network, not how to develop one.
This feels to me like a continuous repeat of what we have been told a lot of times. This is a great advice for someone who has never heard of networking but I didn't find it helpful to re-read some of things that have been told to me a thousand times. I expected more from the article than what was given. The tips/points listed in the article are valid but the explanation of it was very surface based. Even people who are not afraid of person-to-person contact do these things on a regular basis. As a person who is a little bot hesitant when it comes to person-to-person networking, I was looking for tips that would make it either easier to do so or become better at the online networking aspect. I also disagreed with some of the things the author said about people who do not ask for help.
“How to Network When In-Person Contact Stresses You Out” an article by Aimée Lutkin appealed to me because when it comes to talking to others, when I fall I fall hard. Sometimes I can nail it, more commonly with strangers or adults, but when it comes to peers or someone I’ve know I become more likely to stumble with my words. I have the capability to communicate extremely well, my own doubt and worry surrounding the situation is my main downfall. So de stressing before an important in-person contact, and finding different and new ways of doing so I’m definitely open to hearing! I especially needed the advice given in the article titled “Don't Overdo It” because (beside public speaking/presentations when I do freeze up), during in-person contact like interviews or meetings, I usually over explain something to the point where I distract from my original point trying to make things as clear as possible while actually doing the opposite.
I struggle with this not just in my professional life but in my personal life as well. I usually only stay in touch with the people I see on a regular basis, even those who live in the same city but I don't have a standing dinner or class or some other commitment with. I haven't mastered the art of staying in "loose touch" or even being intentional in making time to see people who matter to me and a lot of my relationships suffer for it. However, This article offers good ideas that can be applied to both your personal and professional relationships, and I know from previous professional experience how helpful networking can be. I have learned through experience that people are always willing to help out young professionals. I want to be better about maintaining my networks between all my professional contacts because I have found them so helpful in the past.
This article is more or less stating the obvious. All of the points that were laid out portray basic interaction skills. That being said it is nice to be reminded how to network, no matter the environment. I personally enjoy in-person networking opposed to the more common internet interactions. A LinkedIn message or email will never trump a face to face interaction with a person.
I am not saying that I don’t get stressed out when I am networking in person, especially if the stakes are high, but you MUST get over that. It is scary to think that future generations don’t understand this face to face mentality and believe that you can get by living behind a computer screen. I am not sure what the stats are specifically, but I wouldn’t be surprised if 70% of people you interact with are more likely to remember you in a face to face compared to over the web.
I agree with Chris above that this is another article that talks about the very fundamentals of networking, just not in person but using ‘technology’. So what I am really bad at is the ‘nurture before it’s needed’ part. When my network was just close friends and some bosses from internship, it was not a problem. I could easily connect with them before I needed any help. But once I started working and started to meet ten to thirty new people in every production, the network just grew exponentially. It grew big and shallow so that I can’t keep track of everyone but also don’t know if it’s the right thing to connect with them out of blue. I just ended up contacting people when I need them. But this article reminded me that probably everyone is like that and so people would be rather understanding even if I did so.
I really enjoyed the articles perspective that networking is important not only for advancement, but also as a way you can seek assistance when you need it. Lutkin writes, "A lot of people don’t maintain their networks because they see themselves as an island. They’ll never ask for help. Never!! But this is an untenable position; everyone needs help sometimes, and reminding yourself of that early is good. It means you’ll actually have the right people in your life when the time comes." This really rang home for me--I like the idea of contingency plans, and as an introvert, this is a stronger reason for me to attend networking events with this idea in mind. The article circles back on this idea that people often let networking efforts go lax when things are going well, but the best time to network is actually at the point when you don't need it. That way when it gets hard or something goes wrong, you aren't forcing your way into a relationship that is out of desperation or need.
Like a lot of the people ahead of me mentioned, this article doesn’t really present a lot of new information for us, who have spent years being trained on how to get jobs. I’m sure this article is helpful for others, but maybe as a beginning networking guide. This article is essentially just telling you that networking can be done via the internet now, which is true but also duh. I think a lot of these points, while not new ideas, were very good reminders for me. “Nurture before it’s needed” is a really big point that I’m really bad at. I’m absolutely terrible at keeping in touch with people, and then suddenly they’re the only person I know at a company and I need to use that connection. Especially as a lot of us go into our final semester at this university, these ideas are very important to keep in our heads. Every person could be a potential job, which is kind of a shitty way to view human connection, but not unnecessary.
This article hints at ideas that are very common, but does little to re assure or advice to overcome the obstacles. I am someone who has a lot of anxiety with the idea of networking, actually going up to someone and pitching myself is way out of my comfort zone. But, maintaining relationship with friends in my industry is someone I can handle. I think this article would have been much more successful it is gave concrete ways to network even if you are nervous. Asking for something from someone is hard, especially when it is career related. I try to reverse the situation and think about how I would feel. If someone asked me to introduce them to someone else, or for career advice it would be flattering. That means they see enough in me to be valuable to them and comfortable enough with me to ask. Thinking that way helps me when I think about networking.
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