www.fastcompany.com: When I started my career in the corporate world, I absorbed, by osmosis, the way that I thought leadership was. I worked in a male-dominated environment, in that most of the senior leadership was male, and the women that had risen to the top tended to have more stereotypical “masculine” traits.
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The first time I encountered this issue was in my high school theatre department on my first stage management assignment. Before then, I had been an ASM or a crew member and while I had some leadership duties, I wasn't the main person in charge of a lot of others. Since this was a competition piece, I only had a crew of 4 but they were all guys. It took a long time for them to listen to and treat me like I was in charge. Two of them were older and unarguably had more theatrical experience than I did and while that was a contributing factor, the main reason they struggled so much to listen to me was that I was a 5 foot short girl that wanted to lead in a collaborative and communicative way. During the process, I tried to get them to be more receptive by changing the way I spoke to them or interacted but it was extensively draining to act in a way that I thought would command respect all the time. Removing those expectations for what a good leader looks, sounds, and acts like is so important to fostering gender equality in the workplace.
A genderless approach to not only attributes of leadership, but to characteristics in general also help eliminate the gender binary and the strong root it has in or workplaces and life. It was interesting reading the experience this author has with leadership in male-dominant spaces and comparing it with my own experiences. The first shop space I started working in in high school was male dominated and I would get frustrated when others didn’t think I was capable of things because of my smaller stature – although that really only came up when I was working with older male adults. I think I was lucky that the student that trained me in high school resonated with my enthusiasm for power tools and he wasn't overbearing. However over time there have been traits that I do notice in male carpenters and craftsmen – and in leaders I’ve had negative experiences with– that I think are negative traits and I tend to categorize them as toxically masculine behaviors. I know I still embody some toxically masculine behaviors when I am on the shop floor. I think it’s important to acknowledge that those traits - things like re-explaining simple tasks or doing something for someone rather than teaching them the new skill - are behaviors that men tend to do more often, but more than anything else its just rude and inconsiderate behavior regardless of who does it. When I’m leading a group and I notice toxic behavior, I try to step back, recognize I’m leaning into gendered stereotypes, and try to refocus on making sure everyone I’m working with is comfortable, learning, and having at least a little bit of fun.
YES! I cannot agree more that gendered leadership makes no sense. In fact, in my experience, if we are talking in the binary, the females that have been in leadership positions above me have been incredible to work with. The first time I really realized that there was a gender disparity was when I was working at the school my mom teaches at. I had to design and build the whole set by myself, and when I was putting on the finishing touches, a man asked me if I needed help learning how to use a drill. It really upset me that because I was a woman, or at least thats what I felt like, he thought I didn't know how to use a tool that I had likely more experience with than him. I would love to live in a world where I don't have to think about that. Where I can join a local without not getting calls despite my guy friend who has less experience than me gets every call. I think theatre in particular would really benefit from a genderless approach to leadership.
This article is obviously correct when the author says anyone can be leader. Anyone can be a leader, and they are going to be the best leaders when they lean into their strengths, regardless of if those traits are more traditionally “masculine” or “feminine.” We, as a society, should really empower women, and anyone who does not fit into the stereotypical mold of a leader to resist the temptation to mimic what they have seen as leaders in male-dominated industries. One, it’s going to be exhausting and detrimental to their health. Two, it perpetuates these industries being male dominated. Only those are who are capable of sustaining this behavior succeed for long and the culture never changes. However, if we’re going to empower people to lean into their empathetic, nurturing, and “feminine” sides, we need to make sure that the male-dominated systems in place will not punish them for that. So much of corporate America is networking that individual behavior can only make so much of a difference. From bank loans to investors, a lot of success is dependent on systems that need to be restructured to allow all types of people to succeed.
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