Friday, February 19, 2016
I Wrote a Play with a Male Rape, But Readers Didn’t Want to Call it That
HowlRound: My play The Way It Is features Cane and Yasmine, a couple who have broken up. When Cane returns to the apartment they shared to retrieve his mother’s engagement ring, he is raped by his ex. At least it is my intention that he is.
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7 comments:
This is one of the most interesting topics nobody is talking about nowadays, and I think that theatre might be the exact way to get people to be more cognizant that male rape is a genuine issue. Oftentimes, it is played off in films as being comedic, such as in "That's my Boy" featuring Adam Sandler, in which he has sex with his teacher when he is 13 and gets her pregnant, which no one in the film deems to be disturbing, instead mining all the "comedy" they can out of a statutory rape. The fact that people reading this play viewed the girl as crazy instead of viewing her as a villain exposes a major problem in our culture, one that women are trying so hard to destroy that they end up prolonging it. By claiming that women are strong, when they actually use their strength, they are considered crazy, as opposed to actual agents of their fate. Readers coming up with euphemisms to describe the act instead of calling it rape is a sad way to look at something that actually happens to plenty of men out there. People not liking rape also shouldn't mean anything at all. I don't like broccoli, but I'm not going to call it Spinach. I'm going to call it Broccoli, and we're going to talk about it.
I was really touched by this article, and I think that it touches on so many things that everyone should think about. I am pretty secure in my opinion that as a culture we don't take rape as seriously as we should, and this arctic;e is correct in pointing out that we definitely don't think about male rape as much as it occurs. What was most jarring to me about the descriptions of the play the author received is that they call the woman character crazy so often. The term crazy is used for women in so many different settings that I have a really hard time figuring out what the word actually means, or if it even means anything. People call women crazy when they are mean, or harsh, or irrational and now apparently when they rape. Not only does it make the word lose meaning, but it completely rationalizes the act of rape. If a man raped a woman on stage, no one ever say the man was crazy as one of his defining characteristics, they would say he was cruel and a criminal and hopefully be held accountable for his actions. I think Jacob makes a great point above in talking about the way that the media handles male rape, by basically not handling it at all. I have seen "That's my Boy" and it is not a cinematic masterpiece,but it touches on something very delicate, and turns it into comedy, and the thing about rape is that its just so not funny. People make jokes about all kinds of rape all the time, and in my opinion it is just not something that should ever be talked about unless the people involved are educated and can talk about it in a way that it respectful to the millions of people that have been victims of it. I wish this writer the best of luck with his work, and hope that some day in the future it is brought to an audience that can understand it, and appreciate it for what it is, and not make excuses for it.
I think this is so interesting, nowadays rape culture has become a thing that is increasingly discussed in public forums, however male rape victims are rarely, if ever, given a voice. It is something that I particularly notice because the only rape victim I have ever known personally was male. Therefore, all my personal discussions with a rape victim have been about male rape. But outside of those conversations I have almost never talked about it despite having had many conversations regarding the rape culture of our society and other rape issues like victim shaming. I think the idea of victim shaming goes a long way into why people don’t want to talk about male rape, being raped goes against every twisted ideal of masculinity and machismo our society has and therefore the victims are pressured into shame and silence. I think that most important thing that we can do for this issue is give the victims a voice and let those that are brave enough to speak out that it is okay to talk about this horrible event in their life, and that rape can and does happen to men.
These kinds of plays are always hard to talk about, but that is why they need to be performed. I really wish the author had specified the people who read his play, I want to know how old they are. I was recently having a conversation with someone on how we felt people in my generation, meaning young adults are so much more open and accepting than anyone else, and I really believe it. I would love to know what some college students thoughts on the play were as compared to what I am going to assume his audience was, adults over 30. It is so sad to think that people can't identify something as simple as rape: unwanted sex. Had their been a gender role reversal I'm sure the word rape would of come up more often. I have seen a few shows that portray rape on stage, and some do it what I think is believable and well and others haven't. But, I'm still waiting for a show that really shows rape culture for what it is, no matter who the victim is.
It's very possible that, like the playwright states, all the readers who did not identify the final scene as rape would think differently when seeing it performed live. Having not read the ending, it could very well be that the readers felt uncomfortable identifying the rape because they were simply confused, but once read aloud or performed, it would become clear. So, I don't want to necessarily write off the readers who didn't identify the rape as "perpetuators of rape culture".
That being said, rape in television, movies, and theater is one of the few things that really makes me feel like I want to vomit. Especially in movies and television, I feel that rape is used as a tool for shock value, as death has been almost completely desensitized. While rape culture is an extremely important issue that needs to be addressed - and theater is a good venue to do so - if I knew there was a rape on stage, of anyone, of whatever gender, there is a huge chance I would forego that show. It makes me physically ill - not simply uncomfortable. It is not avoiding the issue - talking about it is fine. But seeing it, on stage, terrifies me. Maybe some of the readers felt that too - their own queasiness was fought by feigning ignorance. I'd have to read the play to find out, I guess.
This article presents a very interesting issue, and really highlights the cultural mindset of ‘men can’t get raped’. It’s something that’s really pervasive in our society, even in cases of child molestation (‘wow, she was a hot teacher’ and ‘I’m sure he wasn’t complaining’ or even ‘good for him’). The fact that people had trouble identifying the scene in the play as rape is not surprising. Although, to be fair, sometimes reading it and seeing it can give two different views. But I think the use of a gun makes it fairly obvious. I can understand why people would be uncomfortable by calling it that. Female rape is normalized in our culture, it prevalent in films, television, pornography, and people happily consume it. But male rape is never talked about. While I think female rape is a troupe often abused for profit, at the least it gets talked about. Male rape victims are so unlikely to report it, because while women face victim blaming, men face being told they aren’t even a victim. But even with all of the unwillingness to call it rape, I’m glad the author didn’t add the second ending. It’s enough to get people talking about what happened at the end, and eventually they will come to the realization. It’s just better if it happens organically.
While reading through the comments section for this article, I found an interesting exchange between the author of the article and an internet posted who critiqued the author for "writing to committee". The author was very quick to assert that they just wanted answers to ensure their true intent for the play was being understood. I think - especially regarding a topic like male rape - the author is in the right. When approaching such a tricky, and often swept away topic, I think ensuring widespread audience comprehension of what the author wanted them to see is not only the author's right, but in this case, their responsibility. Male rape is such a difficult thing to metabolize and discuss. All too often I see it tacked on as an afterthought to discussions of female rape. Not only does this "men can be raped too" divert crucial attention that must be devoted to female rape, it also deprives male rape of the ability to stand on its own legs. Though they share a common root, these issues are very different, and equally deserving (and requiring) of discussion.
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